Must Read - For All Those Girls Before They Get Married to an Overseas Pakistani

[عؔلی خان]

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Must Read - For All Those Girls Before They Get Married to an Overseas Pakistani

My wife left me because she wasn't aware of how hard life abroad is. I live in France and got Nikahfied when I went to Pakistan to visit my parents. It was an arranged marriage. I have an accounting job which pays well, but my wife belongs to a very wealthy family from Lahore. She had it all, servants, chef, driver, everything.

When I met her before Nikah, I told her everything about myself, job, education. I also asked her if she was ready to move to France if we would get married. She immediately said yes. We got married, and I filed for her visa. It took 17 months for the visa process. During this time, we would talk over the phone every day. I told her everything about my life in France. I wanted her to know everything before she moved to France, so there would be no cultural shock.

When I brought her here in France; life started getting really hard for both of us. According to my wife, she had never done house chores, so I continued cooking and cleaning. We would go on a trip every month because she loved traveling. We didn't have any problem till her shopping sprees started getting out of hands. Every time I tried to talk to her that we needed to be a little careful with our expenses. She would say I wasn't a real man because I couldn't afford my wife. All my savings were gone in her shopping. I had a good job, but we were spending so much on useless things. I almost went bankrupt just to keep her happy.

I do remember that we had an argument over 1000 Euros bag that she bought because it was on 10% off sale, this argument became the reason for our divorce. She immediately booked an airline ticket and went back to Lahore at her parents. She never contacted me again. We got divorced just after 3 years of our marriage. I don’t blame her because it was a hard life for her for sure. She never had to lift a finger when she was at her parent’s house, there were no financial restrictions or limitations.

The point of sharing my story is to help people (especially girls) before they get married to an an Overseas Pakistani

1: There are no maids, both husband and wife share responsibilities of cooking and cleaning only if you are lucky. Otherwise, the only wife does the cooking and cleaning.

2: Cleaning includes washing the bathroom as well.

3: Your husband might go to the job early in the morning and come back in the evening, so you have to spend all day at home alone.

4: The car is very expensive in France because of high taxes, car maintenance, petrol, and parking fees. You should get used to the idea of commuting by Train and buses.

In the end, I want to say that maybe your parents already went through the hardship and built themselves an empire, your husband is still very young, help him to build your own empire!

Source: https://www.facebook.com/groups/adminstudygermany/permalink/2474148775935704/

 

[Abid_J]

صبر کر بھائی
اللہ صبر کرنے والوں کے ساتھ ہے

 

[Alpha Charlie]

Exactly ...
It’s struggling in beginning
Things get better gradually

 

[MHAMZA]

Would have been more practical to have married to an educated girl from a Lower Middle class working family ... also professional women doctors , engineers etc are more practically oriented to life abroad ... I wish the gentleman better luck next time...

 

[saadi038]

Very sorry to read your story but there is other side of the coin as well you probably migrated your self and you got married to a rich family in Pakistan. There are many Pakistanis living abroad who get their children married in Pakistan in families or out of families they bring brides or grooms for their respective children and then ask too much they bring a slave from origin country do all of their house work and their specially daughters-housework Who already working in that country as well trust me I’m not exaggerating they need educated wealthy made for them.

 

[Alpha Charlie]

Materialistic families get fascinate towards overseas proposals

Education.Character. Family.Decency.
Left no meaning to them

 

[baalti]

good share... i have seen plenty of relationships go down the drain just due to cultural shocks.... girls think coming to west/abroad will mean wings to fly no work to do etc, and guys will think easy peasy making money and/or want to work that office job nothing else....

bhaiyo aur behno, when you come abroad, yahan ghar ke sabh kaam kaaj khud ya mil ke karnay hotay hain, yahan dono ko noukri bhi karni hoti hai... yahan apni anaaa ko khadday line bhi lagana parta hai... yahan apnay susral mein izzat ke saath rehna bhi parta hai, koo ghunah nahin hai, larki ko chahiyay susral mein rahay ta-kay $ zyada bachain aur apnay khawand ko push mat karo to move out, similarly larkay ko chahiyay ke ghar jamai bhi na bano (job karo) aur issay apni baizti bhi na samjho, it gives you opportunity to save big time... yahan har kisam ki job karni parti hai, ap seedhay apnay profession mein nahin lagain gey, takes time so do the odd jobs.... and most importantly aik dosray ko trust karo, respect do, and i have seen so many couples not having kids or not sharing bank accounts etc, these things will only help towards a divorce... and best of luck...

 

[Alpha Charlie]

Very sorry to read your story but there is other side of the coin as well you probably migrated your self and you got married to a rich family in Pakistan. There are many Pakistanis living abroad who get their children married in Pakistan in families or out of families they bring brides or grooms for their respective children and then ask too much they bring a slave from origin country do all of their house work and their specially daughters-housework Who already working in that country as well trust me I’m not exaggerating they need educated wealthy made for them.

Used to be long ago within some typical illiterate families .

And they all end up in prison
Serious offense in UK

 

[Res1Pect]

Overseas Pakistanis in particular, and every man in general, should try to marry from a middle class family of good manners and ethics. Make sure that they have groomed their daughter well in the household business. While going to the middle class family, you must keep in mind that in most of these families you would find girls with dreams of becoming rich and living like a 'Princess'. This is due to the lack of training and grooming from parents, and under the morbid influence of 'media'...dramas, movies, etc. Avoid such families.

However, if you spend some time and effort sincerely, you'll find one of that 'good nature and nurture' soon. Remember, good things are rare in the 'society/market'.

The most important thing is being a practicing Muslim/Muslimah. No one is perfect but she should be practicing the 'obligation' (fraaiz) in a consistent manner. If a person is not faithful to his CREATOR, he/she would never be faithful to anyone, even to himself/herself. If she fears Allah, she would try her best to be a good daughter, then a good wife, and then a good mother...but only if she is a good servant to Allah the Almighty.

 

[saadi038]

Used to be long ago within some typical illiterate families .

And they all end up in prison
Serious offense in UK

Brother still happening even today right in front of our eyes and not just Europe or America it’d happened in Dubai as well with in our family. Any way look around there so much of these families stories all at us divorce is a fashion now. Recently visited Saudi and even Saudies love divorce their wives. Ordinary not just rich

 

[saadi038]

Brother still happening even today right in front of our eyes and not just Europe or America it’d happened in Dubai as well with in our family. Any way look around there so much of these families stories all around us. divorce is a fashion now. Recently visited Saudi and even Saudies love divorce their wives. Ordinary not just rich

 

[saadi038]

Overseas Pakistanis in particular, and every man in general, should try to marry from a middle class family of good manners and ethics. Make sure that they have groomed their daughter well in the household business. While going to the middle class family, you must keep in mind that in most of these families you would find girls with dreams of becoming rich and living like a 'Princess'. This is due to the lack of training and grooming from parents, and under the morbid influence of 'media'...dramas, movies, etc. Avoid such families.

However, if you spend some time and effort sincerely, you'll find one of that 'good nature and nurture' soon. Remember, good things are rare in the 'society/market'.

The most important thing is being a practicing Muslim/Muslimah. No one is perfect but she should be practicing the 'obligation' (fraaiz) in a consistent manner. If a person is not faithful to his CREATOR, he/she would never be faithful to anyone, even to himself/herself. If she fears Allah, she would try her best to be a good daughter, then a good wife, and then a good mother...but only if she is a good servant to Allah the Almighty.

What about him who’s bringing or not even bring her over to the country married to just satisfy his parents. Then in laws coming to know that he’s already married. My brothers there are so many sad stories around us flip the coin girls do the same to their husbands imported from origin country. It’s a South Asian problem

 

[Wakeel]

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Must Read - For All Those Girls Before They Get Married to an Overseas Pakistani

My wife left me because she wasn't aware of how hard life abroad is. I live in France and got Nikahfied when I went to Pakistan to visit my parents. It was an arranged marriage. I have an accounting job which pays well, but my wife belongs to a very wealthy family from Lahore. She had it all, servants, chef, driver, everything.

When I met her before Nikah, I told her everything about myself, job, education. I also asked her if she was ready to move to France if we would get married. She immediately said yes. We got married, and I filed for her visa. It took 17 months for the visa process. During this time, we would talk over the phone every day. I told her everything about my life in France. I wanted her to know everything before she moved to France, so there would be no cultural shock.

When I brought her here in France; life started getting really hard for both of us. According to my wife, she had never done house chores, so I continued cooking and cleaning. We would go on a trip every month because she loved traveling. We didn't have any problem till her shopping sprees started getting out of hands. Every time I tried to talk to her that we needed to be a little careful with our expenses. She would say I wasn't a real man because I couldn't afford my wife. All my savings were gone in her shopping. I had a good job, but we were spending so much on useless things. I almost went bankrupt just to keep her happy.

I do remember that we had an argument over 1000 Euros bag that she bought because it was on 10% off sale, this argument became the reason for our divorce. She immediately booked an airline ticket and went back to Lahore at her parents. She never contacted me again. We got divorced just after 3 years of our marriage. I don’t blame her because it was a hard life for her for sure. She never had to lift a finger when she was at her parent’s house, there were no financial restrictions or limitations.

The point of sharing my story is to help people (especially girls) before they get married to an an Overseas Pakistani

1: There are no maids, both husband and wife share responsibilities of cooking and cleaning only if you are lucky. Otherwise, the only wife does the cooking and cleaning.

2: Cleaning includes washing the bathroom as well.

3: Your husband might go to the job early in the morning and come back in the evening, so you have to spend all day at home alone.

4: The car is very expensive in France because of high taxes, car maintenance, petrol, and parking fees. You should get used to the idea of commuting by Train and buses.

In the end, I want to say that maybe your parents already went through the hardship and built themselves an empire, your husband is still very young, help him to build your own empire!

Source: https://www.facebook.com/groups/adminstudygermany/permalink/2474148775935704/

یہ کہانی بلکل بھی حقیقت پر مبنی نہیں لگ رہی، ہفتے میں دو تین بار صفائی کے لئے چار سو یورو میں با آسانی صفائی کے خدمات حاصل کی جا سکتی ہیں،

کار پاکستان سے کہیں زیادہ سستی ہیں اگر سیکنڈ ہینڈ خرید لی جائے تو ایک اوسط آمدن والا بھی گاڑی آفورڈ کر سکتا ہے ہاں جو اصل مسلہ ہے وہ لائسنس کا ہے جو کہ بھائی صاحب بتانا بھول گئے۔

 

[saadi038]

Religion is not the issue satisfying the egos is problem, parents do that knowingly to their children and on both sides you need PHD THESIS many of them to understand the problem. Pakistani parents rhetoric statement is “ SHADI DAY BAAD THEEK HO JAAN GAY” fiker na karo. That is sad as well they through their girls specially down the stream. Remembering some Indian movies as well but it’s only in movies, theek ho jaan gay. Parents abroad more responsible because they know 1st their children 2nd the society their children grew up.

 

[kakamana]

well u miss the best part, i think we should mention the biggest plus point is that 90% of time marriage with overseas mean No Saas zone, No Nand zone !!!!!!

Attention Moderator: Please, don't merge. Thank you. ​

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Must Read - For All Those Girls Before They Get Married to an Overseas Pakistani

My wife left me because she wasn't aware of how hard life abroad is. I live in France and got Nikahfied when I went to Pakistan to visit my parents. It was an arranged marriage. I have an accounting job which pays well, but my wife belongs to a very wealthy family from Lahore. She had it all, servants, chef, driver, everything.

When I met her before Nikah, I told her everything about myself, job, education. I also asked her if she was ready to move to France if we would get married. She immediately said yes. We got married, and I filed for her visa. It took 17 months for the visa process. During this time, we would talk over the phone every day. I told her everything about my life in France. I wanted her to know everything before she moved to France, so there would be no cultural shock.

When I brought her here in France; life started getting really hard for both of us. According to my wife, she had never done house chores, so I continued cooking and cleaning. We would go on a trip every month because she loved traveling. We didn't have any problem till her shopping sprees started getting out of hands. Every time I tried to talk to her that we needed to be a little careful with our expenses. She would say I wasn't a real man because I couldn't afford my wife. All my savings were gone in her shopping. I had a good job, but we were spending so much on useless things. I almost went bankrupt just to keep her happy.

I do remember that we had an argument over 1000 Euros bag that she bought because it was on 10% off sale, this argument became the reason for our divorce. She immediately booked an airline ticket and went back to Lahore at her parents. She never contacted me again. We got divorced just after 3 years of our marriage. I don’t blame her because it was a hard life for her for sure. She never had to lift a finger when she was at her parent’s house, there were no financial restrictions or limitations.

The point of sharing my story is to help people (especially girls) before they get married to an an Overseas Pakistani

1: There are no maids, both husband and wife share responsibilities of cooking and cleaning only if you are lucky. Otherwise, the only wife does the cooking and cleaning.

2: Cleaning includes washing the bathroom as well.

3: Your husband might go to the job early in the morning and come back in the evening, so you have to spend all day at home alone.

4: The car is very expensive in France because of high taxes, car maintenance, petrol, and parking fees. You should get used to the idea of commuting by Train and buses.

In the end, I want to say that maybe your parents already went through the hardship and built themselves an empire, your husband is still very young, help him to build your own empire!

Source: https://www.facebook.com/groups/adminstudygermany/permalink/2474148775935704/

 

[Res1Pect]

What about him who’s bringing or not even bring her over to the country married to just satisfy his parents. Then in laws coming to know that he’s already married. My brothers there are so many sad stories around us flip the coin girls do the same to their husbands imported from origin country. It’s a South Asian problem

It's not a South Asian problem. It's human ethics problem. The same as I have mentioned in my first post. If you are faithful to your LORD, you will not cheat others in the name of marriage.

 

[saadi038]

It's not a South Asian problem. It's human ethics problem. The same as I have mentioned in my first post. If you are faithful to your LORD, you will not cheat others in the name of marriage.

Ohhhh bhai if we are faithful to our lord there’s no problem in the WORLD. Tinfoil hat Ittar.

 

[kayawish]

its time for you to join yellow vest protesters in france :ROFLMAO: so ur salary is raised to 5000 euro a month and all is good.life is becomming more hard in france day by day as economy is fucked up.