Seven traits of the average Pakistani man !!!

[canadian]

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Seven traits of the average Pakistani man

Faiza Rahman March 8, 2011

Dont ever bring up his flaws, nothing is ever his fault.


Disclaimer:
The following piece is the result of an opinionated writers bias. Though the writer herself remains miserably devoid of any male attention, she likes to learn through other peoples experiences. Her piece is based on the experiences of many, many married acquaintances.
1. He loves his mom
Mom is an infallible angel. The only way to achieve harmony in your relationship with him is to understand this vital fact. Dont question or contradict this lady who will steer the boat of his life, while you will remain one of the many passengers on-board. She is the average Pakistani mother-in-law and her word will be the final say in most matters marital or otherwise.
Your bathroom fittings and daily wardrobe may also fall under her probing influence. Her cooking is the benchmark that you should aspire to reach. Aspire only, for you will never be able to match her gourmet skills.
And no, he will not cancel the Khawateen Digest subscription to get you The Economist.
2. He doesnt like the movies you like
He might pretend to like Tangled, but he really doesnt. His tolerance towards movies of the like is a toady faade of politeness, an attempt to ingratiate himself with you (for nuptial reasons) or a please, cheer up measure after a particularly fiery quarrel, which obviously was all your fault.
Hed rather you give up your chick-flick obsession and watch Hum TV dramas like his mom (preferably with his mom).
He secretly dreads cinema detours because your ladyship has to be driven to a decent restaurant for a meal afterwards and not to Nagan Chowrangi Nihari House where he likes to go with his cronies to eat nihari and drink lassi and burp without embarrassment.
3. He knows more swear words than you think he does
Despite his urbane style, he has a knack for swear words with grotesque sexual connotations. He has picked most of them up on his Nihari eating pursuits at Nagan Chowrangi.
He might seem like a harmless while he placidly puffs on cigarette, but he is silently serenading your ex-boyfriend with a tirade of swear words.
4. Beauty over brains end of story
No matter what he says to you, he admires your hair more than what lies beneath it. He does not care about your ability to multiply fractions in your head. In fact, he doesnt want you to multiply fractions at all. All he wants you to multiply is the number of his off spring and the food on his table.
He doesnt care if you can recite the Odyssey at the drop of a hat (probably hasnt even heard of that magnificent work). He prefers that you look pretty and sit silently while passing occasional smiles to his mom on the breakfast table; rather than have spirited discourses on the morning news headlines with his father while bearing huge eye bags because you were up memorising the Odyssey all night.
5. He loves his car
Please dont brush your hair in the car. Step out on the side walk to do it. Buy candy with the money that is tossed at you.
6. He wont notice your freshly plucked eyebrows
Or your new earrings or your manicure. Aversion to detail has been vested in him by nature itself. He cant tell cyan from turquoise or fuchsia pink from magenta, or magenta from maroon. Its either pink or not pink.
No, he will not catch any subtle looks you give. Either you say it in words, or you dont say it at all. This man is Saeed Ghazis nightmare. But yes, he will definitely notice the extra flab youve recently acquired while trying to drown your vexations in the ghee-laden gajar ka halwa that his moms been making (and secretly eating despite her soaring cholesterol levels.)
7. He likesshareef, sharmeeliandsuggharhgirls
He thinks Sharmila Farooqui is a vile woman whose first name is misleading. He thinks she is an exhibitionist who comes on TV only to display her new hair streaks and designer shalwar kameezes.
Obviously, as an average resigned-to-home Pakistani girl you are thoroughly in awe of the ladys austere confidence in herself. But no, he does not care about how wrong or right her views are, so stop asking.
What she says can never be of consequence because she is just a shameless woman who does not know her place. He thinks women should all sit at home in peace and help reproduce for their husbands.
Shareef girls personify the excellent merits of womanly impassiveness to the extent of having just no opinions at all.
Shareef girls just watch the news, and then gasp, pat their bosoms (Lollywood style), shed a tear or two of commiseration and then quietly recommence the discussion on the news-casters wardrobe with the average Pakistani sister-in-law.
Shareef girls dont discuss the Hudood Ordinance, because shareef girls dont quite know what the Hudood Ordinance is. They blush prettily at any mention of the Hudood Ordinance and excuse themselves to go and display their sugghrapa in the kitchen, which results in the multiplication of the average Pakistani mans food supply. Meanwhile, he ogles at Sharmila on television.(http://blogs.tribune.com.pk/story/4785/7-traits-of-the-average-pakistani-man/)

 

[Unicorn]

I am fascinated with the disclaimer. Devoid of male attention may not be such a miserable experience when weight against the content. I need to interview her about her disclaimer.

 

[baaghi01]

bechari ko bohat bura experience hua hai lagta hai. roye jaa rahi hai.kis ne kaha tha itne experiences karne ko.

 

[Maryam.]

I just find this whole concept of women always criticizing men so retarded. This just sounds like another one of those women belonging to NGO's always chanting for more freedom and independence. Seriously, they are not as oppressed as they pose themselves to be. Belonging to a Pakistani middle class family, I know there are limits and men have the upper hand but there is NOTHING wrong with it!! They don't oppress you. They help you, appreciate you, and also support you! What may appear to these women with complexes as oppression is actually protection from the men!! So what if a man loves his mother more? So what if he appreciates her cooking more? So what if he thinks of her highly? She's his mother!! And then its the same girls crying that their mother-in-law is mean or evil. They seriously need to have a look at themselves and their attitudes first before expecting from others. Ofcourse there are exceptions, but stop with the generalizations already! Plain sick of Pakistani women trying to always prove Pakistani men to be arrogant low-lifers or vice versa.

 

[canadian]

I just find this whole concept of women always criticizing men so retarded. This just sounds like another one of those women belonging to NGO's always chanting for more freedom and independence. Seriously, they are not as oppressed as they pose themselves to be. Belonging to a Pakistani middle class family, I know there are limits and men have the upper hand but there is NOTHING wrong with it!! They don't oppress you. They help you, appreciate you, and also support you! What may appear to these women with complexes as oppression is actually protection from the men!! So what if a man loves his mother more? So what if he appreciates her cooking more? So what if he thinks of her highly? She's his mother!! And then its the same girls crying that their mother-in-law is mean or evil. They seriously need to have a look at themselves and their attitudes first before expecting from others. Ofcourse there are exceptions, but stop with the generalizations already! Plain sick of Pakistani women trying to always prove Pakistani men to be arrogant low-lifers or vice versa.

Wow !
It's nice to hear another version from a Pakistani Lady.
I fully agree with her:)

 

[Unicorn]

I just find this whole concept of women always criticizing men so retarded. This just sounds like another one of those women belonging to NGO's always chanting for more freedom and independence. Seriously, they are not as oppressed as they pose themselves to be. Belonging to a Pakistani middle class family, I know there are limits and men have the upper hand but there is NOTHING wrong with it!! They don't oppress you. They help you, appreciate you, and also support you! What may appear to these women with complexes as oppression is actually protection from the men!! So what if a man loves his mother more? So what if he appreciates her cooking more? So what if he thinks of her highly? She's his mother!! And then its the same girls crying that their mother-in-law is mean or evil. They seriously need to have a look at themselves and their attitudes first before expecting from others. Ofcourse there are exceptions, but stop with the generalizations already! Plain sick of Pakistani women trying to always prove Pakistani men to be arrogant low-lifers or vice versa.

I don't know how you came to your conclusion. Faiza Rahman, author of this article is not complying about men. She is a young girl pursuing a Major in Political science, according to her she is very opinionated. She wrote a disclaimer that you did not read. In it she has clearly stated that she wanted to learn from experience of others. Her article is about what "other women' complain about marriage. To me she come across a very bright young girl, i doubt very much that she will go through the experience of the women being interviewed in her article.

I believe she is very self confident and most men will find her very intimidating. I think every one should be very proud of her.

Those " EVIL" women belonging to NGO are not complaining about their own rights. They assist and represent women who are victimized day in and day out ie acid thrown at their face for not making friends with a guy. Would you agree that acid should be thrown on such a women? and no one should represent them.

 

[Maryam.]

I don't know how you came to your conclusion. Faiza Rahman, author of this article is not complying about men. She is a young girl pursuing a Major in Political science, according to her she is very opinionated. She wrote a disclaimer that you did not read. In it she has clearly stated that she wanted to learn from experience of others. Her article is about what "other women' complain about marriage. To me she come across a very bright young girl, i doubt very much that she will go through the experience of the women being interviewed in her article.

I believe she is very self confident and most men will find her very intimidating. I think every one should be very proud of her.

Those " EVIL" women belonging to NGO are not complaining about their own rights. They assist and represent women who are victimized day in and day out ie acid thrown at their face for not making friends with a guy. Would you agree that acid should be thrown on such a women? and no one should represent them.

What makes you say I did not read the disclaimer? I have read it and I understand it as well. Like you said her article is about "other women", I'm referring to those other women more than the author anyway.

The LAW of the country needs to protect its citizens more than anyone else, be they male or female. Why is it always about the Pakistani men are like this and Pakistani women are like that? Where did I call women from NGO's evil? As far as throwing acid on people's face is concerned, there is no justification for such acts and I strongly condemn them. (That was a very off-topic comment by the way.)Its very absurd to say that NGO's work for such acts and represent those women only. They don't. Most of the time these women from NGO's are telling women to ask for divorce and be independent and whatnot. The divorce rate in Pakistan has increased so much over the years thanks to these NGO's. They don't do ANYTHING to try to save the marriage..and all they teach women is to leave their husbands and be independent. Up till this day most NGO's have showed Pakistani women to be oppressed and suffering which is simply not true. There are exceptions always but they have done their best to generalize. I'm a Pakistani girl as well, my brothers, father, male relatives everyone has supported me to this day. Women in our family get higher education, work and help their husbands as well.

So why is it always the "Pakistani men are like this or that"? Also, not just this article but lots of other things I've come across where women believe themselves to be oppressed because of their husbands or mother-in-laws. It starts from a women herself, her attitude, her behaviour and how she handles things to begin with.I've seen married women complain about minor things a lot, and its those women who are the root cause of those problems at times but they fail to realize that. It's very easy to go ahead and blame it all on others. I'm no feminist and I won't be until basic human rights are met. If women suffer to some degree then so do men. Why don't these NGO's stand up for men when they suffer? Why don't they do something against those rich landlords who have oppressed men? Men are treated like slaves as well in rural areas, why doesn't anyone raise their voice for them? Is asking a women to get divorce and be independent easier than going against powerful landlords who have roots in politics? I guess so. I'm not justifying any act of injustice by either men or women, but let's just be honest and fair for a change and think beyond the women are oppressed notion.

 

[Unicorn]

What makes you say I did not read the disclaimer? I have read it and I understand it as well. Like you said her article is about "other women", I'm referring to those other women more than the author anyway.

The LAW of the country needs to protect its citizens more than anyone else, be they male or female. Why is it always about the Pakistani men are like this and Pakistani women are like that? Where did I call women from NGO's evil? As far as throwing acid on people's face is concerned, there is no justification for such acts and I strongly condemn them. (That was a very off-topic comment by the way.)Its very absurd to say that NGO's work for such acts and represent those women only. They don't. Most of the time these women from NGO's are telling women to ask for divorce and be independent and whatnot. The divorce rate in Pakistan has increased so much over the years thanks to these NGO's. They don't do ANYTHING to try to save the marriage..and all they teach women is to leave their husbands and be independent. Up till this day most NGO's have showed Pakistani women to be oppressed and suffering which is simply not true. There are exceptions always but they have done their best to generalize. I'm a Pakistani girl as well, my brothers, father, male relatives everyone has supported me to this day. Women in our family get higher education, work and help their husbands as well. I've seen married women complain about minor things a lot, and its those women who are the root cause of those problems at times but they fail to realize that.

So why is it always the "Pakistani men are like this or that"? Also, not just this article but lots of other things I've come across where women believe themselves to be oppressed because of their husbands or mother-in-laws. It starts from a women herself, her attitude, her behaviour and how she handles things to begin with. It's very easy to go ahead and blame it all on others. I'm no feminist and I won't be until basic human rights are met. If women suffer to some degree then so do men. Why don't these NGO's stand up for men when they suffer? Why don't they do something against those rich landlords who have oppressed men? Men are treated like slaves as well in rural areas, why doesn't anyone raise their voice for them? Is asking a women to get divorce and be independent easier than going against powerful landlords who have roots in politics? I guess so. I'm not justifying any act of injustice by either men or women, but let's just be honest and fair for a change and think beyond the women are oppressed notion.

She has cited seven stories in this article. Point it out to me any story where a woman has complained about her rights. Article contains stories all about women talking, as two women talk in an ordinary household, that there is some thing irritating about men in their lives, there is no indication that any one is unhappy in the marriage.

She lives in Pakistan, males she comes across, are all Pakistani. She cannot write anything about Chinese men, even though situation is the same there as well. At least I don’t believe that she has anything against Pakistani men she was raised by one, a good one I might add.

You are blessed that you live in a household where all family members supports each other and all families should be like yours but unfortunately many women and men are not so blessed.

I think you are painting NGOs with a broad brush every story is different in some cases divorce is the only option. There are NGOs that cater to oppression of men as well some have women members as well.Perhaps one day you can pickup a cause that you believe in and work at it in an organized way.

You mentioned “this sounds like one of those women” indicates that you did not pay any attention to the disclaimer otherwise your comment would be “all these women”

 

[Maryam.]

She has cited seven stories in this article. Point it out to me any story where a woman has complained about her rights. Article contains stories all about women talking, as two women talk in an ordinary household, that there is some thing irritating about men in their lives, there is no indication that any one is unhappy in the marriage.


She lives in Pakistan, males she comes across, are all Pakistani. She cannot write anything about Chinese men, even though situation is the same there as well. At least I don’t believe that she has anything against Pakistani men she was raised by one, a good one I might add.


You are blessed that you live in a household where all family members supports each other and all families should be like yours but unfortunately many women and men are not so blessed.


I think you are painting NGOs with a broad brush every story is different in some cases divorce is the only option. There are NGOs that cater to oppression of men as well some has women members as well.
You mentioned “this sounds like one of those women” indicates that you did not pay any attention to the disclaimer otherwise your comment would be “all these women”

I have said in my first post that I find the concept of women criticizing men all the time retarded. Once again, not just this piece but a LOT of other things that do their best to pose women as oppressed. So clearly didn't mean this one only? I've come across way too many articles where women pose themselves to be innocent and men to be wrong. That is what starts to irritate me because I've seen so many women who are wrong yet fail to admit.

Secondly, I don't have any issues with the writer, when I use the word "they" in my post I'm clearly referring to women in general and not the writer. Sorry if that line wasn't clear enough.

I'm criticizing NGO's because of their focus on one area more than the other. Most NGO's have focused on woman's rights and fail to bring other things to attention. I will start supporting them the day they stop painting Pakistani men to be oppressive and women to be oppressed because these things really do damage to Pakistan's image in the international community. Men and women are treated unequally all over the world which is wrong, but in Pakistan I've seen most people generalize and it really gets on my nerves. I'll say it again, there ARE exceptions..but generalizations are what gets me irritated.