Like any mind-bending hollywood thriller, the Joint Parliamentary Session 2014 will have to be watched several times to completely unfold all the subtle messages and lessons for the people of Pakistan. To get you started, here is my list on the first attempt:
1. Some Genies come out of hiding when you rub the chiraagh, others wait till thousands of people gather and march towards the parliament. [source: Aitezaz Ahsan]
2. It is pointless to dispute Nawaz Sharifs legitimacy as the Prime Minister of Pakistan. Since he is now the elected President of Pakistan. [source: Nabi Bangash]
3. Mickey Mouse is a Dirty Rat. Disney has conspired against the children of Pakistan. [source: Aitezaz Ahsan]
4. An EBE - Extraterrestrial Biological Entity i.e. Makhlooq has been sighted in the parliament. It reportedly co-exists as a Rat and a Snake. The parliament is undecided whether to form an Investigative Committee OR inform the Animal Control Department. [source: Khursheed Shah]
5. Airing each others Dirty laundry inside the parliament for point scoring IS constitutional, airing your own laundry for cleansing on the fence of the parliament is NOT [source: Fazlur Rehman]
6. Some parliamentarians expiate sins though Hajj, some recommend court rooms while others are adamant about professional cleaners. [source: Aitezaz Ahsan]
7. Entrance into an un-guarded PTV building by a group of hippies khaana badosh is a threat to democracy; <fineprint> Democracy can always be strengthened by ordering to beat and kill those hippies or any other hippies for that matter. [source: Achackzai]
8. Owning a pet (dog) disqualifies one from representing the public interest and holding a public office, lying and cheating under oath DOES NOT [source: Saad Rafiq]
9. There is one thing common between the Parliament building and Karachi donouN ko Tsunami se khatra hey or donoun ki taraf aankh utha kar dhekney walouN ko sabaq sikhaaya jaye ga [source: Khalid Maqbool]
10. Just like some infinities are larger than other infinities; some diesels are thicker than other (Vin) diesels. And thats why the honorable speaker must accept the resignations immediately. [source: Fazlur Rehman]
11. Democracy can be saved in several ways, some parliamentarians went to great lengths to ensure that. They cuffed, dragged and shipped Democracy out of Pakistan several years ago. With the will of ROs election, the democracy has been reimported back into Pakistan. Those Parliamentarians will now stand with his Excellency to uphold democratic traditions and defeat the dirty people of Pakistan. [source: Aftab Sherpao]
12. In the interest of the people of Pakistan, Parliamentarians can and should forgive each other for crimes and corruption against the people of Pakistan. [source: Choudhry Nisaar & Aitezaz Ahsan]
13. For unknown reasons, the integrity (ghayrat) of Fazlur Rehman is doubtful. However, there is no doubt that Achackzai doesnt have even a shred of integrity. [source: Aitezaz Ahsan]
14. In times of turmoil, dealing with unconstitutional speech takes precedence over serving justice to the grieved. [source: Joint Decision]
15. The catalogue of unconstitutional speech ghair-parlimaani zubaan has been extended to include the word OYE. To educate the people of Pakistan, Sharif factories are installing new machinery to mass print the catalogue for distribution. The cost of this project will be distributed over the next years electric bill. [source: Joint Decision]
16. The current parliamentarians cannot be judged for their own actions. The people of Pakistan are reminded that they are still in debt for what the long-gone forefathers/leaders of these parties accomplished e.g. Bhutto , Bacha Khan etc The parliament did not announce when and IF that debt will ever be paid off. However, they are trying to get as many foreign loans as possible to help us in the matter. [source: Joint Decision]
17. Democracy has never been allowed to develop properly i.e. it cannot swim at this point. But democracy is brave, it tries to stand in the waters when the cameras are around. [source: Shahbaz Sharif & Bilawal Zardari]
18. While other media channels are only good for taking a beating from the police, Geo outperformed to reserve the right of mention in the parliament. Drum bajaa ke Geo!
[source: Nawaz Sharif]
1. Some Genies come out of hiding when you rub the chiraagh, others wait till thousands of people gather and march towards the parliament. [source: Aitezaz Ahsan]
2. It is pointless to dispute Nawaz Sharifs legitimacy as the Prime Minister of Pakistan. Since he is now the elected President of Pakistan. [source: Nabi Bangash]
3. Mickey Mouse is a Dirty Rat. Disney has conspired against the children of Pakistan. [source: Aitezaz Ahsan]
4. An EBE - Extraterrestrial Biological Entity i.e. Makhlooq has been sighted in the parliament. It reportedly co-exists as a Rat and a Snake. The parliament is undecided whether to form an Investigative Committee OR inform the Animal Control Department. [source: Khursheed Shah]
5. Airing each others Dirty laundry inside the parliament for point scoring IS constitutional, airing your own laundry for cleansing on the fence of the parliament is NOT [source: Fazlur Rehman]
6. Some parliamentarians expiate sins though Hajj, some recommend court rooms while others are adamant about professional cleaners. [source: Aitezaz Ahsan]
7. Entrance into an un-guarded PTV building by a group of hippies khaana badosh is a threat to democracy; <fineprint> Democracy can always be strengthened by ordering to beat and kill those hippies or any other hippies for that matter. [source: Achackzai]
8. Owning a pet (dog) disqualifies one from representing the public interest and holding a public office, lying and cheating under oath DOES NOT [source: Saad Rafiq]
9. There is one thing common between the Parliament building and Karachi donouN ko Tsunami se khatra hey or donoun ki taraf aankh utha kar dhekney walouN ko sabaq sikhaaya jaye ga [source: Khalid Maqbool]
10. Just like some infinities are larger than other infinities; some diesels are thicker than other (Vin) diesels. And thats why the honorable speaker must accept the resignations immediately. [source: Fazlur Rehman]
11. Democracy can be saved in several ways, some parliamentarians went to great lengths to ensure that. They cuffed, dragged and shipped Democracy out of Pakistan several years ago. With the will of ROs election, the democracy has been reimported back into Pakistan. Those Parliamentarians will now stand with his Excellency to uphold democratic traditions and defeat the dirty people of Pakistan. [source: Aftab Sherpao]
12. In the interest of the people of Pakistan, Parliamentarians can and should forgive each other for crimes and corruption against the people of Pakistan. [source: Choudhry Nisaar & Aitezaz Ahsan]
13. For unknown reasons, the integrity (ghayrat) of Fazlur Rehman is doubtful. However, there is no doubt that Achackzai doesnt have even a shred of integrity. [source: Aitezaz Ahsan]
14. In times of turmoil, dealing with unconstitutional speech takes precedence over serving justice to the grieved. [source: Joint Decision]
15. The catalogue of unconstitutional speech ghair-parlimaani zubaan has been extended to include the word OYE. To educate the people of Pakistan, Sharif factories are installing new machinery to mass print the catalogue for distribution. The cost of this project will be distributed over the next years electric bill. [source: Joint Decision]
16. The current parliamentarians cannot be judged for their own actions. The people of Pakistan are reminded that they are still in debt for what the long-gone forefathers/leaders of these parties accomplished e.g. Bhutto , Bacha Khan etc The parliament did not announce when and IF that debt will ever be paid off. However, they are trying to get as many foreign loans as possible to help us in the matter. [source: Joint Decision]
17. Democracy has never been allowed to develop properly i.e. it cannot swim at this point. But democracy is brave, it tries to stand in the waters when the cameras are around. [source: Shahbaz Sharif & Bilawal Zardari]
18. While other media channels are only good for taking a beating from the police, Geo outperformed to reserve the right of mention in the parliament. Drum bajaa ke Geo!
[source: Nawaz Sharif]
- Quaid-e-Azam ne farmaaya Tu chal, meiN aaya [source: Zard- Aari]
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